Ronald McDonald Wants My Soul and Other Weird Dreams

I had some very short dreams last night. All of them weird, all of them very different. These took place between the hours of 4 am and 6am.

Dream 1: It started of nice and cheery — it very much gave me the vibe of Disneyland minus the mouse ears. The street were cobbled with red and orange brick, the sky was blue with sparse clouds, and the buildings were all brightly colored, almost cartoonishly so. People cheerfully walked out of shops and down the street. I walked down the road with no particular destination when out jumps Ronald McDonald, acting like an obnoxious street vendor as he jumped around and waved his arms in an attempt to get the attention of the people around him. They just ignored him, and I planned on doing the same.

“You there!” he shouted, focusing on me. I inwardly groaned, but donned a fake smile. I can be a bit of a pushover sometimes.


“Would you like to see my new restaurant?”

Before I could answer, he pulled me over to his building. Unlike all the other brightly colored places around it, it was a dull grey. The building looked like it needed a great deal of maintenance. I was pushed in before I could run away.

The inside looked like an emptied-out McDonalds, the layout was all there, with the exception of a large conveyor belt that was slowly churning patties from a hole in the wall that lead to an unknown location.

“Do you want to know what these delicious patties are made of?”

No. No I did not.

He bends down slightly to whisper in my ear.


I am so glad that the dream just stopped there.

Dream Score: 1/10. Creepy clown. Questionable fast food? Nope, I’ll take a hard pass on that.


Dream 2: I was sitting in my backyard with several people I knew in college. We are all preparing for some sort of skit that we had to perform in the next few minutes. The prompt  was about fireworks, we had to compare them to something tragic instead of happy. I wrote it, but didn’t memorize my lines. The other’s kept having complaints about the script, but I had no memory of writing it, so I had no idea what I should do to fix it.

The dream ended abruptly.

Score: 4/10/ Meh. Just meh.


Dream 3: In this dream, I woke up on the floor. It was made of chrome tiles that bled into the equally chrome walls. I stood up, only to be hit by an electric shock.

“Ah ah ah,” a chilling voice called from behind me. The speaker was an old man dressed in the stereotypical “mad scientist” style. “I wouldn’t do that.” He shocked me again.

He would keep shocking me no matter which direction I attempted to flee. I finally realized the the electric currents were only present if I stepped outside a certain perimeter. Though the floor consisted of square tiles with built-in gridding, there was no indication or marker to distinguish the “safe” tiles from the dangerous ones; it was like an invisible dog fence. Through trial and error, I found that I was trapped in a space about the size of two SUVs. The shape wasn’t even square or rectangular, it was Z-shaped, like that stupid Tetris piece that you never want.

The mad scientist laughed maniacally as I pondered over my predicament.

Score: 4/10. I was a lab rat. I think.


None of these dreams had endings, and none of them are ones I would ever want to visit again. I blame that on the uncomfortably small mattress that I’m sleeping on while visiting my parents. Discomfort = weird, choppy dreams.


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